WhatsTheBuzzAbout.com

How to Manage Rebellious Connections and Group Members

Many individuals have different expectations of their electronic connections than they have of their offline connections. Some individuals expect their offline connections to have a modicum of social awareness and self-control, while they do not expect the same of their online connections. For others, the reverse is true; they may have higher expectations from their online connections than they have of their offline connections.  Do you have different expectations of conduct based on whether you communicate with a person offline or online?

Regardless of the expectations, there are always online connections and group members who push the boundaries of courtesy and good taste. Connections and members could disregard the impact that their emails or postings might have on others. They could ignore the requirements of the site that excludes postings that use profanity, or they could post material which might be viewed as libelous. Individuals may ignore messages that request them to take certain actions. They may not play by the rules, and deliberately flaunt authority, or act rudely.

You will observe that many individuals will attempt to calm the rebellious individuals through reason, requests, and tolerance. Most times, this is ineffective. Rebellious connections generally are people who do not have respect for rules and boundaries. They will push the limits. They will be the ones who do not follow the guidelines. They will push until you prohibit them from taking the action they want to take, or until you cut the connection.

The question you have to answer is whether you have any significant reason for continuing to permit their behavior, or maintain the connection.  It becomes a clear case of anticipating what might happen if you do sever the relationship or restrict their behavior, assuming you are in a position to do that.  You have to decide whether doing so is worth it. You will be surprised at how little damage is done by taking action.

These individuals are the equivalent of bullies on the playground. If you are concerned, you can be assured that you are not alone. If you take action to end the situation, you can be assured that you are not alone. Do not permit the online connection or member to take more of your time than is warranted or to cause you concern. Deal with the problem, and deal with it quickly. You will be pleasantly surprised that a weight will be lifted from you, and your online experience will be more gratifying and conflict-free.

What is your buzz about?

Who Really Is An Expert In Social Media?

There are many pundits, consultants, and users in the social media space who claim to be social media experts. Let’s assume for the moment that we agree on the definition of “social media” for purposes of this discussion, and that the definition is limited to media that uses web-based technologies and where individuals create applications and content. Using that assumption, it appears that no single individual can be an expert in all these areas.  

However, it is reasonable to believe that in spite of the constant change in social media space, individuals can become experts in specific areas by gaining specific knowledge and skills, and then demonstrating specific acumen in using components of social media. For example, individuals can be strong social media historians, or application developers, or content providers, or individual application users, or generalists, etc. They can be prolific inventors, bloggers, networkers, speakers, teachers, etc. What they cannot and should not do is purport to be social media experts who can personally address any issue in the social media space with expert knowledge and delivery.  At best, an individual can be an expert in a particular area of social media, and know who is an expert in another area.

We must begin to think of social media with the same respect and awareness that we give the medical profession. We do not expect our “general practitioner medical doctor” to be the person who does eye, dental, knee, or heart surgery. Similarly, we should not expect our social media experts to know all the intricacies in every aspect of social media. Instead of a term that is glibly referred to in general, “social media” should be more appropriately recognized as the science of social media.

Like health care, social media is woven into the fabric of our lives. Its applications may drive our decisions and how we spend our time. Users who abuse social media can find themselves responsible for causing car accidents, broken homes, and other negative situations. On the other hand, using social media judiciously improves the quality of our lives.  We need to take care of social media just as we take care of our bodies and our minds.

When we have a question related to social media, we need to find the right person who has expertise in that social media area. If you are seeking help, look for consultants who have expertise in the specific area in question.  For example, wanting a “web presence,” is much different than wanting to implement cloud computing in your organization. Setting up a blog is much different than learning how to use one of the major business social media networking sites for a job search. Your role as a user is to find the individual who can help you, and who has the network to call upon when your needs expand–your social media general practitioner.

What is your buzz about?

Adapting to Social Media Change

Change is something that that people may embrace and welcome. However, they may also fear change and be reluctant to accept it. Social media is notorious for changing quickly. It seems that as soon as we are accustomed to working within a specific social media environment, the system is tweaked–sometimes for the better, sometimes for the worse, and sometimes back to the previous environment as public uproar may demand reversal of an earlier change.

We are the recipients of change in those environments that we do not own or are not in a position of being responsible for authorizing changes. Therefore, we are simply the recipients of the implemented changes and have the choice of accepting change, fighting it, or avoiding it through other actions. On occasion, changes make it more difficult or complicated for us to conduct business.

 Usually, changes are implemented with good intentions. However, social media is just another business, and changes may be “beta- tested,” but rarely are changes designed or determined from the user-up. Commercial entities still believe that they have a handle on what is best for their consumers rather than have their consumers determine how best the entity can serve them. We have constant reminders of this management thinking, from revised soft-drink formulas that are later recalled to hardware with reception flaws, to safety issues with children’s toys to automobiles to internet privacy. VRM (Vendor Relationship Management) is not the norm. With over five years since its formal introduction, it deserves to be widespread.

Until its adaption, we need to learn to step back and work with changes that are thrust upon us. As most difficult events in life, change demands patience, adaption, and respect. We should take each change as a simple and normal evolutionary process on the road to improvement of whatever is being changed. We must take these steps if we are to adapt to change with the least amount of difficulty and most pleasure.

• Recognize that change is inevitable
• Expect change
• Identify the change
• Accept the fact that change has occurred
• Bring your flexible, adaptable, and patient traits to the forefront and know your power
• Determine how the change affects or does not affect you
• Determine if action is needed on your part to achieve a desired result
• Evaluate how the action you take (even if the action is no action) will impact you
• Take the appropriate action
• Confirm that your action has brought you the results that you want
• Notify the vendor if you would like to see additional changes or modification of what was changed
• Live with the change if you continue to use the vendor
• Enjoy your success at your adoption of the change

You will soon learn that you will view change as a challenging friend. You will become a master at adaptation as well as become more active in providing feedback.

 What is your buzz about?

Determining Who is Real

In the virtual world, we constantly encounter individuals about whom we have to make judgments; we have to decide whether we want to connect with them, do business with them, have social online connections with them, refer them, recommend them, or have some other type of ongoing relationship with them. Making those determinations without a face-to-face meeting is risky, but reasonable. As we know, even face-to-face interactions do not always ensure that we have a solid and trustworthy relationship.

One of the major social networks has begun to attempt to assist group owners to make strategic, informed decisions regarding accepting members into groups. In this particular case, the network identifies individuals who have one or less connection and who are applying for membership to a group. It remains the responsibility of the group owner to determine whether to allow that individual into a group. Limited connections alone do not indicate that the individual in question isn’t trustworthy.

The determination as to whether someone is factual or honest about his or her identity, location, work, accomplishments, interests, etc., is one that remains subjective. If there was an easy answer, individuals would not be hired and then fired for misrepresenting their information on a resume, etc., deals would not go bad, and the behavior of some individuals would not be characterized as deceptive or false.

The longer you are active in social media, the more aware you will become of how easy it is to misunderstand the emailed word, or the intent of someone; you’ll also realize how many individuals are ‘bad news’ for generating viruses or other conman activities. One thing you should never take for granted is your instinct. 

What are some quick indicators of ‘unreal’ people, or people who may cause you issues down the road?

• They may not use their real name in business environments. For example, they may register on a business web site as Mr. K, or Estate Girl, or the name of the company for whom they work. They may use a name like “Been There” or “Search Search.”
• They may not follow the rules of the social media web site. The site may specifically state that email addresses should not be included in the name, and these individuals include them or other characters or symbols – such as &$#+! – to try to make themselves stand out. If they refuse to follow simple rules, or if they act as though the rules do not apply to them, are they trustworthy?
• They may have web links that do not work, limited or no work history, incomplete profiles, no web site for their place of work, placeholder web sites with little or no information, no connections, etc.
• They create confusion associated with their web presence. For example, they may have multiple profiles on the same social media site instead of a full profile about them –one profile for each thing in which they are involved with different email addresses.
• They may share the same email address with another person — perhaps even register as one person with two names. Sometimes, husbands and wives in business think this is the way to go–that it is a cute and loving thing to do. However, it makes it difficult for the person on the other end to communicate because of the dual issue. Again, this is another example of complication and complexity.
• They are kicked off the same social media site more than once, and bounce in and out of sites.
• They assume different names using the same photo. For example, they could be registered as Rick XYZ, Rick XYZE, Rick XYZEK, using the same email and the same photo.
• Their names or emails may be suspicious. For example, they could call themselves “Exon Veldoz” or  “goldbullion@youcanhaveallyouwant.com.”
• They may have limited profile history and/or few connections.
• They claim to do the impossible in their profile.
• They do not keep their information reasonably up-to-date

Most of these indicators are just that – indicators. You can use these to tweak your decision matrix, and trust your instinct. It is far easier to be circumspect in the beginning than to clean up an electronic association.

What is your buzz about?

Breaking Social Network Ties With Individuals

Have you ever wanted to break a connection with someone on a social network and were reluctant to do so? Do you have connections that are causing problems in your network? Perhaps you have decided that you want to establish a smaller network. The issue is not the technical act of disconnecting, but how to do so responsibly. You have to decide whether you believe that reaching out to an individual is necessary.

Disconnecting from connections without notice

It is not bad form to simply disconnect without notice. Rarely, do individuals notify other individuals when they disconnect, and there is no social protocol that requires notification. In many networks, you can simply disconnect, and the affected individuals are not notified.

Think of disconnecting with someone as discontinuing your membership in a group. When you choose to leave a group, you probably do not notify the members before you take action. In theory, when you leave a group, you are disconnecting from the other members in that particular forum. When you disconnect from an individual in a social network, you are simply disconnecting from them in a larger forum.

Disconnecting from connections with notice

In some networks, individuals are notified when you disconnect. When you disconnect , your previous connection may be notified of your action in a very obvious manner or more discreetly. You may also decide that you want to notify your connection that you plan to disconnect.  Remember, that the very act of reaching out extends the length of time of your connection.

If you decide to provide notice you are under no obligation to provide the reason for your decision unless you choose to do so. You may be disconnecting because you are no longer in the same line of work, and continuing the connection will not be financially beneficial to either of you in the short-term. You may be simply paring down your number of connections. You may be concerned with the postings that your connection is making, etc.  Perhaps your connection is inundating you with requests to connect in many other forums, or perhaps he or she put you on an email blast list that you somehow cannot stop. You do not need a ‘good’ reason to disconnect. Connecting is your choice–disconnecting is also your choice.

If the individual is aware that you disconnected with him or her, and does not want to lose that connection, he or she will reach out to you and inquire why you disconnected in an attempt to re-establish the connection. You can then have a dialogue and decide if you want to reestablish the connection in that same venue, or in another manner, or not continue the relationship beyond that dialogue.

Whether you decide to provide notice or not, do not ponder for any length of time about the decision. Make it and move on.

What is your buzz about?

Don’t Be Fooled – Social Media for Business is Business

We have all seen them–those people who really believe that what they post is private and will stay that way in perpetuity.  They join virtual gift and fighting clubs, set up farms and aquariums, use profanity,  and post negative messages on web sites.  They are your neighbors, your fellow religious observers, your business colleagues, your relatives, and your friends. Start an online group and watch what they do. It is fascinating to follow people on the various sites.

You will find that some people start out gingerly, putting the proverbial test link out to determine if someone is watching them or even cares what they post. Others seek to make notches on their social media chart, adding up connections, as if anyone will be continue to be impressed  that someone has 35,000 people connected to him or her.  With close to seven billion people on planet Earth, these super connectors have barely set foot on the journey.  Some people will not even connect, will not share their name, will bend the rules for registration, and believe they are above the restrictions placed on others. Pride is evident in some profiles, humbleness in others.

If you are a teen in social media, you are expected to use it for fun as well as other reasons. If you are an adult, social media should still be fun. However, if you are a professional business person, while social media is fun, you need to keep yourself focused; even while social media can be fun, potential clients, business partners, employers, and others will search you out and will conduct research (due diligence) on you. Are you happy with what you are doing online?

Each of your tweets, blogs, postings, connections, groups, and networks speaks the silent electronic language about what is important to you. Does marking “like” on something mean you actually support it or do you “like” it because you found it interesting, stimulating, well-written, thought-provoking, or even the anti-thesis of what you support?  How does someone evaluate “like” and understand your intention?  How about when you check that you “like” someone’s profile?  The same questions apply.

Social media for business people is business–it is public business, and it is your business that is publicly displayed.  Does what you do online reflect you? If someone wrote a bio about you, using social media research, would it be something that is a true representation of you and that you could honorably support?

We grew up being taught to think before we speak. Now, we need to be taught to think before we write.

What is your buzz about?

Should a Moderator be Moderate?

Moderators are in an interesting position. A moderator is able to control who joins and who remains a member of a group, as well as who posts and what posts are permitted. Moderators also have the opportunity to post  and control members’ access at will. Many moderators take their work very seriously and do a great job at ensuring quality conversations and the membership of the group remains spam-free.

The designation of a moderator is an important key into the success of that group. A moderator is the individual charged with protecting you from inappropriate postings, shielding you from ill-intentioned individuals, and maintaining focus. Moderators reflect our humanity; they can be autocratic, democratic, or even laissez-faire. Sometimes, moderators will simply take the middle road by choosing not to enter into conflicts or limit their visible participation.  If you have been in groups where the main participant is the moderator, you may find that participation level stimulating or frustrating.

Should you be a moderator?

Before you decide to take on the role of moderator, you need to understand what you are willing to permit that might not be in line with your opinions or in the manner in which you express yourself. Do you want the group to take on the task of language if someone uses profanity in a posting or will you ignore it, handle it privately, or handle it publicly? Are you willing to alienate someone by denying membership into the group, removing him or her from the group, or deleting a posting? Will you permit the equivalent of spam postings or will you control them?  Will you permit individuals who are prolific to post significantly more than anyone else? Will you use the platform to promote your own interests using tools only available to moderators, such as email blasts? What is the level of commitment you are willing to make? Will you be online many times a day to check? Will you stick with the role for a certain period of time and secure a successor before giving up the role?

What type of moderator do you appreciate?

If you are a passive participant, you might want a moderator who is really hands-on and very active. The groups that you choose to join and remain as a member might be those whose moderators are active.

If you are an active participant, the level of a moderator becomes less significant because you are actively creating value for yourselves and others and are less dependent upon the moderator to fulfill that function.

Regardless of the quality or characteristics of a moderator, groups can and do survive with or without them. A group is only as good as its membership. What individuals choose to discuss or with whom they choose to interact will make the difference. An occasional inappropriate comment or perceived spam message is a small price to pay for the value which a solid and interactive group provides.  

What is your buzz about?

Safeguarding Your Reputation

As you know reputations can be created or destroyed through social media. Perceptions about you can be changed in an instant by those who observe what you post and what is posted about you or about others and entities to whom and to which you are associated. Some people will paint negative pictures with a broad brush when they learn of illegal business practices of a company and will shy away from anyone associated with that company, whether that individual was guilty of those practices or not.

Over the course of a few years, we have seen reputations tarnished by illegal corporate dealings, assumed greed, assumed guilt, inaccurate facts outlined by politicians or the media, irresponsible actions by those in power or who have had a certain degree of prestige and respect afforded to them before the actions, statements which had to be recanted or “clarified,” and the list goes on. The power of the written word memorializes these circumstances. You may read a “bad report” and assume it is factual unless you do further research and discover that it was retracted.

You may assume that that negative reporting will never affect you. Do you know the actions of everyone who shares your name? Even those who share your name can affect you depending upon their actions, etc.  Have  you searched your name thoroughly looking for bad news? Have you ever sent an email and regretted its content or wish you could have tweaked it? Have you ever sent an email to one person in error when it should not have gone to him or her but to an entirely different person? Have you ever posted something and received a call that someone was offended by what you posted–perhaps you posted a restaurant review that wasn’t stellar, or an experience on a particular trip, etc. ? 

Everything you post is public, every group you join is public (whether the group claims confidentiality or not–the members of the group know you are a member), most every email you send or receive can be made public if law enforcement becomes involved, your movements on the internet are tracked by cookies and if you are on racy sites or violent sites that you would not want a child to be on, you could be tracked again by law enforcement.

If you want to safeguard your positive reputation, you can take a number of steps on a consistent basis to accomplish that goal.

1. Keep your word and your commitments.
2. Associate with those individuals and sites which have high ethical standards.
3. Follow the requirements of the social media sites.
4. Temper your postings with respect and well-intentions.
5. Do not evil-speak. That is, unless you have a legally binding obligation to do so, do not speak negatively about others and keep your negative thoughts unspoken.
6. Forgive people who have offended you or for whom you hold a grudge. You will be surprised how a simple act of forgiveness will lighten your load and permit you to treat everyone with respect and kindness.
7. Accept recommendations if a quid pro quo is not expected.  Provide one when you truly believe it is warranted.
8. Go the extra step to help someone who needs that help.
9. Walk in love.
10. Conduct yourself as you would want others to conduct themselves.

You will find that you will attract good people to you and that you will rarely have to apologize for your words or your actions.  Best of all, you will be aware of how your words and actions may be perceived and you will check yourself in the beginning. Your reputation should be a strong and accurate reflection of you!

What is your buzz about?

Make Time to Learn

Have you purchased hardware or software and do not know how to fully use the capabilities offered? Have you joined social networks and do not know how to move around in them? Have you downloaded shortcuts and do not know what they offer in total? Perhaps you purchased accounting software for your business and never set it up. Perhaps you traded in a cell phone and never used its features other than to receive and make calls. You may admire someone who is moving around a mobile device with ease and full use, knowing that you may not even have programmed in the telephone numbers you use all the time. Can you list what social networks you joined or what software and hardware you own without referring to a list or other documents?  Do you jump on the latest technology just because it is new?

Most of us do not take the time to fully use what is available to us to use. We learn what we need to learn in order to use those features which are the most important to us. We choose to take shortcuts in how we use technology and social media for our purposes.  We make a decision to not take time to explore certain things in depth. We take care of business at the moment, and have a cursory knowledge of all the technology with which we interface and then manipulate.

However, with the beginning of the Gregorian calendar year it seems an appropriate time to reflect on how we do things, how we prioritize things, and what is significant to us. It is a good time to remember that our power may be limited by our knowledge. We do not know that which we do not know.  It is an opportune time to  make learning a priority.

It might be an interesting exercise this year just to pick one thing a week and explore it, learn what it has to offer, take advantage of any new features you identify that might be an asset to you, and enjoy the thrill of mastering another product or network. If we begin to explore and learn about capabilities, we may learn that there are features that would help us streamline our work, ease our use, and enable us to spend less time at a task.

You will be surprised if you take the time to learn. There will always be at least one little nugget to take away from this exercise. If nothing else, you will not have any questions about whether you are taking full advantage of your ownership or membership, and you will have a sense of accomplishment. You will be able to be a repository of first-hand knowledge for others and continue to have a strong base from which to build.

Take time to learn. Take time to explore.  The rewards are great!

What is your buzz about?

The Art of the Invitation

It seems that sending invitations to connect one-to-one on a social network or to join a network, forum, or group is a relatively simple, logistical process. However, sometimes individuals do not send invitations with care or respect. Sometimes  you may receive invitations from individuals whom you do not know and who do not make the effort to explain to you why they want to connect with you.

You may receive duplicate invitations from some individuals regardless of whether you respond to his or her initial or subsequent invitations. You may receive invitations from individuals who disguise themselves in emails, by using nicknames, initials, etc. You may receive invitations which have missing links or which contain viruses, worms, Trojan horses, or blended threats.  You may receive invitations simply because some individuals collect contacts or even are driven to compete to be number one in whatever venue with respect to the number of connections.

You may find individuals who send an invitation  and who already apologize for sending it to you if you have already accepted a previous invitation from him or her. You may receive invitations to connect with the same person on ten or more social networks, and question whether there really is a reason to connect with that individual on so many networks. Shortly, you may find that particular connection might result in viral invitations from others whom that same individual has invited to connect on multiple networks.

Invitations, once accepted may result in connections who were once welcome and then become unwelcome as those connections continue to proliferate your inbox with more invitations, blogs, newsletters, promotional information, requests, and “just thought you might be interested” emails. Disconnecting/unfriending is an arduous task and brings up another whole set of etiquette issues.

Establishing Your Own Invitation Style

Perhaps in the rush of your business and personal life you have never taken the time to think about how to frame your invitations or to whom should be the recipient or how those invitations might be perceived.

The numbers game — If you are a “contact collector” whose only goal is to enlarge your number of connections, then the only thing you need to be concerned about is the rate of return. You are an individual who does the electronic version of direct mail and only the response rate matters. Your invitations are framed, not for the purpose of making substantive strategic alliances or friendships, but rather to increase the number of connections for some future purpose. Take a look at the response that you receive from different networks if you are using standard invitations to determine if certain language might result in a higher response rate.

The selective connecter — If you issue only selected invitations in order to increase your network for some definitive business or social purpose, you might want to consider tailoring your invitations to include some information about yourself or your business in order to spur interest in connecting.

The reciprocal connector – If you generally limit your invitations to those who have invited you to connect on a particular group, etc. and you want to continue that connection in another venue, you should have a high response rate. If you do not, then you need to include the fact that you are already connected on another venue and want to perpetuate that connection on this additional group, etc.

The sporadic or casual connector – If you periodically or generally choose to connect with individuals for a variety of reasons your invitations may not be tailored to them.  By including a brief reason for the connection request, other than a simple “I would like to connect,” you will increase the likelihood that  the recipient will accept the invitation.

How you chose to  issue invitations reflects on your professionalism, your personality, and your purpose. As usual, the electronic word may be in perpetuity and, therefore, deserves consideration. Impressions can be made through electronic mediums just as well as in person, whether those impressions are first time or otherwise. Treat others as you would like to be treated. Proof your work, give due respect, and consider the value of the recipient’s time. You will be rewarded with strong, solid connections, and good will.

What is your buzz about?